Build Up


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released July 19, 2014

photo take by Jackson! @ Spider House



all rights reserved


CALYX Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

Caitlin Bender, Garett Cassidy, & Jon Ahn.

In jamming we trust.

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Track Name: Blood Moon
awake again at 4 am, no one's bothered
static on the radio, but i'm not alone
all their eyes are fixed on earth's moving shadow
hoping change will come through dripping blood

if this is how it is, it's better than it was
you can't hold on to everyone

don't read too much into the pollen mixing with the falling snow
cut my tongue out, hoping in its place something good will grow
unfurling new leaves, while burning the rest
making room for the new means removing the dead

it's not poison - it's just not healthy
don't take this personal problem so personally

don't read too much into the feathers blocking out the sun
the shot left them scattered but gravity's gonna do what it's always done
your lungs keep pumping, you keep breathing out and in
stagnation's solution is constant motion

it's gonna do you goooooood
Track Name: Curtains
need the hair of the dog but i can't find him
if i do
i'll eat him alive start flyin high over this bullshit

it's been a plague since the first day
time outs, freak outs, learn how to regulate
but what's life without spice?
what am i? not sugar not nice

you can stay constant
you can hold steady
deny the foundation's crumbling
or you can be xyz for eternity
with all your insecurities

stay vague
stay safe

like dragging glass across open eyes
hoping when they heal you'll have better sight

will you stay if i hang the curtains?
throw the bottles away and change my sleeping patterns?
how much do i need to bend?
i'm willing to break
but what do i mean when i say...
Track Name: Double Dog Dare
your voice round every corner
a city covered in your skin
bits of teeth that fill the gutter
broken when you first bit in
you ripped shallow roots from familiar soil
to plant them in superstition
trading routine for routine
waking up sick from the same old thing
you're nauseous from the patterns

quarter century passed - not too bad but nothin that'll last
promises of broken light fill the sky
but i prefer a threat

this is a stare down
this is a double dog dare

the earth threw me into the air
i laughed as the bridges hit the water
lives were lost, but lives were saved by the love of the game
disaster and circumstance took my hands and kissed my face

keratin spills out of me
i am afraid to sleep
since when do i prefer my nightmares to waking?
logic spirals, truth dilutes
constant searching and you become consumed

i am holding on to the days when i was younger
as if this circle connects in a way that i may witness

why keep order when disorder calls your name like it knows ya?
when the wind holds you better than their arms?

ask me
ask me anything

ask me to stay.